I need to learn to embrace the things and places around me.
Embrace new surroundings.
Embrace new people.
Don’t try to make it or expect it to be my own, what I’m used to.
Don’t try to make it ‘comfortable’.
I should appreciate the place for what it is for the time that I’m there. Right?
I won’t be there forever…
But, here’s the thing though.
It feels like the more you embrace something else, somewhere else, and all it has to offer, is the more you lose you.
A part of you. A piece of you.
A piece of your centre, a piece of your core.
To make space for this ‘newness’ you’re about to experience.
You have to give to get..
Is that so?
Cause if it is, I dunno if I wanna embrace.
I don’t want to lose me. I don’t want to lose my Caribbean-ness.
To embrace a place, does it mean to adapt?
To adjust?
To conform?
To better fit in and get the real experience?
Can you be ‘you’ in a different place while still ‘being’ in that space – embracing it for all it is and all it has to offer?
Can you do that and still feel centered?
Can you do that and still hold to your foundation, your core?
Are you allowed to add your own flare?
Leave a little of you in the space?
Is that embracing it? Or is that changing it?
Can you? Embrace it all without leaving a piece of you to make space for a piece of it?
Can you?
Written on 25th February 2018
2 Comments
Nicole Strange · April 21, 2019 at 12:22 pm
I totally understand how you felt when you wrote this. I definitely experienced it as well but honestly I’ve had this emotional trauma at every major life change, going to a very white very Southern college, moving to Boston/New England and being confronted with life in a huge diverse city, getting married, having my first child, and most definitely when we all first moved to NZ. It took me about a year to really wrap my head around what my life should look like here but once I “leaned in” it was so good and now when I go back to the States I almost feel as if I’m split. There’s part of me that still feels grounded in Americana but there’s an equal part of me that has now embraced much of what being kiwi is all about.
Global Gyal · May 3, 2019 at 1:31 pm
Hey Nicole, this is EXACTLY what I’m talking about. I guess my biggest fear is feeling ‘split’. And I directly/indirectly take actions to make sure if anything I’m holding onto my ‘Caribbeaness’. But, the thing is, without even trying I’m sure it’s happening where I’ll eventually get to that point where I feel I’m just as much from the Caribbean as I am a ‘child of the world’. But hey, who knows? 🙂 Thanks for commenting and sharing!